Originally written in September 2013
Am I a misogynist? I don’t know.
It is a well known fact that women are attracted to bad-boys. That makes it hard for any man placing high importance on the life of virtue to respect women.
Left on her own without any kind of social conditioning a woman with good SMV (sexual market value) would not choose an intelligent, respectful, dutifully loving, caring and virtuous man. Because they are beta male qualities. In the evolutionary past those qualities would not have conferred survival advantage on men. Men carrying those qualities would die out sooner than those carrying what are called alpha male qualities.
Alpha males are physically strong, emotionless, overly self-confident, lacking empathy, narcissistic, psychopathic,.. It is not a stretch to understand that unlike the beta traits mentioned above, these are the traits that correlate with the behavior which is necessary to survive in the harsh conditions of the wild state of nature.
It was to women’s advantage to choose alphas for mating partners. Women mating with alpha males would have better chance at survival and leave more progeny. Thus, evolution naturally selected women who would be attracted to alpha males.
But isn’t virtue all about fighting one’s nature and check harmful natural impulses and emotions by the use of rationality? What else is being human?
Most conflicts in our lives are due to the non-reconciliation between our nature shaped through evolution and the current living environment. Owing to rapid increase in intelligence our living conditions have changed faster than the pace at which evolution progresses. As a result we experience many impulses that served a useful purpose in the evolutionary past but are harmful today. For example, aggression in men. Since men’s role was to face dangers, aggressive men were more successful at survival in the state of nature, so evolution favored aggressive men. That is why men are more aggressive compared to women. However, today we are no more living in the conditions where men have to face such dangers that require them to be aggressive. Therefore, aggressiveness is a negative quality today. Calmness is generally considered a positive trait. Even though nature has made men more aggressive, virtue is to be able to remain calm.
Likewise, even though nature has shaped women’s biology to be attracted to bad-boys, virtue for women is to be able to love decent men and choose them for mating partners. Failing which a woman can’t be seen as virtuous.
Now we don’t live in the jungle. But like men are still more aggressive than women owing to their evolutionary past, women too have retained their nature. They are attracted to uncaring, narcissistic assholes. The fact that in the current living conditions these qualities may not confer any survival advantage on men (sadly) doesn’t matter. Calm, intelligent and virtuous men would be better able to provide for their women and the family today, and women understand this rationally. But they are biologically incapable of being aroused by such men, at least not so much as alpha males arouse them. That is the reason why compared to men, women in their prime suffer more internal conflict about selecting a partner.
I think it won’t be totally inaccurate to say that since the time we were apes women have not fully evolved to select a human being (a reason-oriented creature) for mating partner.
Civilization in large part owes itself to religions and their imposed restrictions on sexual activities (regulation in the sexual marketplace). In the natural conditions where women would only select alpha males for mating partners there is no possibility of the civilization as we see it today. Civilization has progressed so far because religions by regulating sexual marketplace made sure that women selected virtuous beta males as husbands who would stay committed for life and form families.
I am forming a thesis that it is difficult for men to be virtuous only because being virtuous has negative payoffs in the sexual marketplace. Since life is fundamentally about leaving behind one’s genes though reproduction, qualities that serve that goal the best in the sexual marketplace are naturally selected in organisms. By that reasoning, lack of virtues in men is attributable to women’s tendency to reject men with virtue under unregulated conditions. If virtue was an advantage in the sexual marketplace, that had to draw more and more men towards the life of virtue.
It is thanks to religions and traditional cultures that being calm, caring, loving, dutiful etc. came to be considered as being virtuous. And it is because they implemented mechanisms wherein women would choose virtuous men for husbands that we see men with those qualities around. Tradition, thus, gave incentives for men to be good. And gave good men the fortune of having a woman to love and create a family with.
Instead of bashing religions and traditional cultures of the past for restricting their freedoms, I think, women should be thankful to them. For they made women lovable and worthy of respect. Alas, but now and in the future where women have their freedoms, and there is no influence of religion on people’s lifestyles, and where traditional values are forgotten, biology will once again rule in the sexual marketplace.
Expect the decline of marriage, decline of family, rise of assholery in men, rise of sluttiness in women,.. The end of civilization as we know it is nigh. That is the female biological imperative.
I don’t hate women. I just am pro-civilization.